2015 Berkshire Career Fair

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Holiday Stress
by: Avi Dresner
As usual, this column is
due right before
Thanksgiving and, as if I’m
not stressed out enough
about the upcoming kick-off
to the frenetic holiday season, now I’ve got one more
thing to do and too little
time to do it. Sound familiar?
Of course, I’ve known this column was due
for a long time now – just like we all know
when the holidays are each year (except us Jews
and Muslims, who operate on the seasonally
variable lunar calendar) – but here I am again
stressing over what to write, and if I’ll get it in
on time, to say nothing of how the heck you
spell Chanukah, Hanukkah, Hanaka? I swear
there must be a million different variations.
Similarly, there are probably as many different types of holiday stress and ways of dealing
with it – good and bad – as there are people.
So, let me offer just a few general categories
and techniques that I hope you’ll find as helpful in getting you through the season as I do in
getting me through this column. I’ll begin
with delegating. In your case, it could mean
lightening your load by delegating to others
some of the items on your Holiday To-Do list.
In my case here, it means delegating to a couple of experts, who are far more qualified to
talk about stress than I am.
Back in November, I did the latest installment of a Quarterly Behavioral Health Series in
collaboration with The Brien Center in
Pittsfield. My guests were Nancy Apkin,
Program Director for Adult Outpatient Services
at Brien’s North Adams site, and Dr. David
Wehry, Brien’s Program Manager for
Community Based Flexible Supports. The subject was holiday stress, and we began by talking
about how it is different from regular stress.
To summarize, imagine the iconic Norman
Rockwell painting “Freedom From Want.” If
you can’t picture it, it’s the one with the
grandfatherly and grandmotherly couple serving the enormous turkey to their assembled
Rockwellian perfect family. Now, I don’t
know about you, but that doesn’t look like my
Thanksgiving at all, which is far more likely to
have my 4-year-old hitting my 2-year-old with
a drumstick, and a cranberry sauce retaliation
that, if I were painting the scene, I’d title
“Texas Chainsaw Thanksgiving.” This gulf
between the Rockwell holiday scene and reality is in part what Apkin has in mind when she
says that the holidays are full of “shoulds.”
What makes holiday stress different from
everyday stress, according to Apkin, is the fact
that “we are bombarded with things we are
‘supposed’ to be doing…We should be having
family come over…etc.” Dr. Wehry echoes
this when he says that “sometimes holidays
can be an unwanted reflection of what things
are supposed to be like.”
In addition to the stresses of hosting, traveling and gift buying, both Dr. Wehry and Apkin
put family at the top of the list of holiday stressors (although not their own, of course:) As
Apkin puts it, another thing that makes holiday
stress different from everyday stress is that “family dysfunction and discord can be magnified by
the holidays.” Put another way, to quote
Tolstoy from the first chapter of Anna Karenina,
“Happy families are all alike; every unhappy
family is unhappy in its own way.” And nothing brings that out like the holidays. I’m sure
everyone reading this has a face or story that
comes immediately to mind.
On the other end of the family holiday stress
spectrum is the stress that comes from not having loved ones around due to military deployment, other familial obligations, or far more
permanent reasons. Skype can certainly help
alleviate the former, according to Wehry – especially for young kids, who relate better when
they can see the person vs. just talking on the
phone – but, obviously, no technology exists to
help us reach those we have lost. Apkin cites
her own loss of loved ones over the years as an
example. “It’s challenging to face those firsts
[without your loved one] and certainly that first
holiday…What was helpful for me was to not
do the usual. Doing something new and different – perhaps starting a new tradition makes
sense – it certainly did for me.”
As one might expect from representatives of
our region’s premier addiction treatment facility, both Apkin and Wehry note the tendency
of people to self-medicate during the holidays
whether that takes the form of too much turkey, too much eggnog or worse. And, as one
also might expect, both cite exercise as a great
way not only to burn those extra holiday calories, but also to burn off excess holiday stress,
with the bonus of offering a respite from the
family members who may be causing it in the
first place.
So, with all of that in mind, I wish you
Happy, Healthy, Wellthy, Stress-free (as much
as possible) Holidays & a Happy New Year!
See you here in 2015! ■
Avi Dresner is a certified personal trainer, and the owner of
Well@Work, a Workplace Wellness provider to businesses of all
sizes. He is a member of the International Association for
Worksite Health Promotion, and the American College of Sports
Medicine. He is also the host of Well Talk, a weekly health, fitness, and wellness radio program heard throughout the Berkshires
and beyond. The show schedule and podcasts are available at
WellTalkRadio.com, and Avi can be reached at avi@
WellTalkRadio.com and at (413) 446-6611.
Kristine Hurley,
Downtown Pittsfield, Inc.
HAPPENING TONIGHT!
Eat, Drink, & Be Merry - ‘Tis the Season to be Jolly!
Wed., December 3 | 5 – 8pm | Crowne Plaza, 1 West St. | Tickets $20
Heavy Hors D’oeuvres and cash bar, music, raffles, and more.
You may still be able to get tickets, call 413.443.6501.
Be part of the Berkshire’s Best Holiday Celebration - Join Downtown Pittsfield, Inc., Berkshire
Chamber of Commerce, and the Crowne Plaza as they come together to celebrate the most
wonderful time of the year!
x First Fridays Artswalk with Leo Mazzeo’s Downtown Photography & Marguerite Bride’s
“Christmas on Park Square 1912”
Fri., December 5 | 5 – 8pm | Downtown Pittsfield, Inc., 33 Dunham Mall
x Upstreet Holiday Festival presented by the City of Pittsfield’s Office of Cultural
Development and Downtown Pittsfield Inc.
Sat. December 13 & 20 | 10am – 2pm | Palace Park Parking Lot across from the Lichtenstein
Center for the Arts, 20 Renne Ave.
Featuring the Berkshire Eagle Holiday Photo Booth, Santa and Mrs. Claus, free train rides from
Roaming Railroad, live music, crafts, face painting, a cookie decorating station by Madeleine’s
Patisserie and Cafe and the Boys and Girls Club Keystone group (a high school volunteer
program) selling pretzels, popcorn, and chestnuts with a game zone as well. x Jingle Bell Run presented by the Berkshire Running Center (42 Summer St.) to support
the Eagle Toy Fund
Sat., December 20 | 9am | Call 413-344-4472 for details
Downtown Pittsfield, Inc. fosters the on-going growth and vitality of downtown through vision,
leadership and advocacy and positions downtown as the creative and business hub of the Berkshires for
the benefit of all. Visit www.downtownpittsfield.com or call 413.443.6501.
SAVE THE DATES:
2015 Berkshire Career Fair
Thursday, March 5, 2015; 10am-4pm
Uniting local employers with the Berkshire talent they need to succeed!
2015
Saturday, April 11-Sunday, April 12
It’s the LARGEST show of its kind in the Berkshires!
For information on how you can save on these events and more, along with
information about sponsorship opportunities, call (413) 499-4000, x 126.

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