Empowering hairdressers in suicide prevention Che Kerr at the Waka Hourua conference Hairdressers and barbers are often listening to intimate and traumatic stories from clients who wouldn’t dare share them with their own family and friends. Some of these stories involve suicide, or depression, which often causes angst among those in the profession in how to deal with it. Hairdresser Che Kerr had her own battle with suicide. That experience inspired her to run suicide prevention awareness workshops for hairdressers and barbers, enabling those in the profession to share their unique experiences as a way to recognise then address potential tragedies and learning to cope and take care of themselves. MICHELLE CURRAN reports Che Kerr believes hairdressers are not only employed to cut hair, but talk all day. Seeing her bubbly and radiant persona, it’s hard to believe she once tried to take her own life. Those dark days were when she wouldn’t, or felt she couldn’t, talk. Deciding to eventually share her innermost thoughts, however, saved her life. The 32-year-old is here today, living life to the full with her husband Matt, and their two boys. “I have a real joy of life now – that was something I couldn’t see before,” Che says. Of Tongan (Nuku’alofa) and Maori (Ngapuhi) descent, Che grew up in Rotorua and was still at school when she first encountered suicide. “A really good friend of mine took their own life at high school. We were 16 years old – an age when you think people shouldn’t have a care in the world,” she says. she moved to work on Auckland’s Hibiscus Coast. One day, a client came in, sat in the chair and told Che that her son had taken his own life. Che burst into tears. “I just wasn’t prepared for that conversation,” she recalls. “As a hairdresser, nothing can prepare you for that type of conversation and there were no guidelines or training available back then for what to say or how to talk about it with a client.” Soon after, Che’s cousin -took his life, leaving behind a partner and two kids. Needing a fresh break, Che moved to Sydney to work. She hit the party scene hard. A year later she returned to the Hibiscus Coast, depressed and deep in debt. “I didn’t talk about it. All my friends were away at the time and I felt really alone,” she recalls. “That really stuck with me and I found it hard to get past.” “And I felt shame for being depressed.” At age 16, Che left school and took up hairdressing. Three years later The combination of depression, debt, unemployment and enduring 8 Pacific Peoples Health www.pacificpeopleshealth.co.nz a relationship break-up over a period of months proved too much for Che. “I had bottled everything up. I thought what I was going through was too big to share,” she says. “That’s when I made the decision to take my own life.” Eventually, she emerged out of the darkness. Once she began talking about how she felt, the healing process began. “When I finally did share, I learned problems are never as big as they seem compared to when they’re stuck inside of your head,” she says. “Talking is so important. In different cultures and in some families, people find it hard to talk about suicide. But people need to talk about their feelings and issues. Not talking nearly took my life. As a survivor, I know talking is healing.” if their clients appear to be at-risk. “During the half-hour, I educate people about what signs to pick up on and provide a list of resources,” she says. “It’s important to remember that I’m not trying to raise a whole lot of psychiatrists … just raise awareness of how people can help others.” Che delivered the pilot programme in late 2014 to salons and gained positive feedback. She is working on a strategy to roll it out further. Le Va fund Che’s workshops through Waka Hourua. Le Va’s clinical lead Denise Kingi-’Ulu’ave also accompanies Che to workshops providing support and guidance. Last year, Che gave up hairdressing to be a stay at home mum. When she learned of the alarmingly high suicide figures among Maori and Pacific people, however, Che knew she had to do something. “Hairdressers have access to many people and they have a unique relationship with many of their clients,” she says. Che believes there is something about being touched on the head, a tapu area in Maori and many Pacific cultures. She says it relaxes people, causing them to often share their thoughts and feelings with their hairdresser. Che developed the concept of running free 30-minute workshops for hairdressers and barbers, to raise awareness about suicide, and provide information about what to do The Le Va team members (l-r) Gerhard Sundborn (Research Lead), Monique Faleafa (Chief Executive), Denise Kingi-‘Ulu’ave (Clinical Lead) and Jay Williams (FLO Co-ordinator) FLO: Pasifika for life Many of us have experienced the shock and sadness of losing someone who has taken their own life. New Zealand has staggering rates of suicide and attempted suicide – and the death and attempt rates are alarmingly higher among Pacific and Maori people. In 2014 Maori and Pacific communities joined forces in the form of Waka Hourua, the first-ever suicide prevention programme of its kind. The Pacific programme, FLO: Pasifika for Life, is for the first time opening up the conversation on a national level for Pasifika communities to develop their own solutions. Every year, around 500 people take their own lives, while many more attempt it. For one suicide death, at least 6 others are severely impacted by grief and have an increased risk for suicide between 2 and 10 times higher than the general population. well being for Pasifika, is leading FLO - NZ’s first ever national Pacific suicide prevention programme. Waka Hourua, brings together Le Va and Te Rau Matatini, with a shared vision and common cause of reducing suicides among their people. Suicide in New Zealand is an ethnically disproportionate issue. One in five people who die by suicide are Māori, and Pacific people attempt suicide three times more often than the general population. Speaking at the first Waka Hourua national hui-fono in November, clinical psychologist Dr Faleafa emphasised that they will be doing things differently for Pasifika suicide prevention. “FLO aims to connect communities, families and organisations so that multiple groups are contributing to building resilient and flourishing Pasifika families at multiple levels across New Zealand in a coordinated way.” Launched in March this year, FLO is empowering communities to deliver their own solutions, funding 17 different Pasifika groups to address suicide from within their own communities, and funding quality research to build knowledge on ‘“what works’” for Pasifika. Le Va Chief Executive Dr Monique Faleafa says that Pacific communities are seeking solutions to suicide with a sense of urgency. “In general, Kiwis are not inclined to talk about suicide or how we are feeling, and that impacts on our ability to reach out for help. For Pacific communities, this silence can be sometimes be compounded if we perceive suicide as a tapu issue from cultural and spiritual perspectives.” The non-government organisation Le Va, which focuses on holistic www.pacificpeopleshealth.co.nz “In order to come up with effective solutions, we need to understand suicide, and in order to understand suicide and suicide prevention, we need to first talk about it.”. Dr Faleafa is adamant Pacific Peoples Health 9 that it’s a myth that ‘talking about suicide increases the risk’, and in fact, talking about it increases help-seeking behaviour. Le Va works alongside creative artists, churches, media and, clergy, and has ambassadors in various Pacific communities, to ensure messages are conveyed in an appropriate way. “There are appropriate and safe ways of talking about suicide and suicide prevention. We have consulted our Pacific communities throughout the country, through 15 fono and over 400 attendees and our results show that the readiness to talk is there, and with the right resources, appropriate education, and taking collective responsibility, we can all play a role to bring change.” Le Va promotes these Top 5 Tactics as protective factors for and enhancing resiliency for Pasifika people. Le Va is developing resources and education tool kits for Pasifika communities. TOP 5 TACTICS 1. Good communication 4. Strengthen family Communication is the heartbeat to nurturing healthy family relationships. Find ways to have open, meaningful, supportive, nonjudgmental conversations within your family. This will provide a safe space for children to reveal what stressors and pressures they have - such as peer pressure or bullying. Research shows the first three years of a child’s development is critical to his or her wellbeing. What will truly help children thrive? Along with food, warmth, shelter and clothing: feeling safe and secure; love and hugs; praise; smiles; positive encouragement; Research shows the first three years of athings. child’s feeling heard; time & attention; learning new development is critical to his or her wellbeing. Effective be life changing for all Whatparenting will trulyprogrammes help childrencan thrive? involved. Recognise, allow and accept experiences from all the Along with food, warmth, shelter and clothing: feeling safe and secure; love hugs; praise; smiles; positive encouragement; generations inand your family. feeling heard; time & attention; learning new things. MYTH - Talking about suicide increases the risk It’s ok to talk. If we do it the right way, it can actually reduce risk. Talk means less stigma. It encourages us to seek help. 1. TALK 2. Strong cultural identity 5. Connect with others Use your culture don’t lose your culture. Pull together this will Connect with your make us stronger. emotions through For young Pacific people in New Zealand, the stronger their cultural identity, the stronger their mental wellbeing. What is culture? It includes our own internal library of diverse experiences and stories. Our own library, and that of our family. We must embrace and strengthen our cultural identity in order to strengthen wellbeing and have a happy life. 3. Find hope and courage through spirituality Spirituality is a personal journey of transformation, hope and courage. Church elders and spiritual leaders are well placed to play an important role in preventing Pacific suicide. They can provide support, information and create new initiatives within the church. 10 Pacific Peoples Health 2. CULTURE Be social. MUSIC, It takes a village to raise a child. ART, Healthy relationships are vital for and those with diverseof purpose. wellbeing and sense RelationshipsEXPERIENCES help us during tough times. Connect withIt’syour emotions Pay okay to ask it forforward – share a smile, a hug, hang out professional help!those through MUSIC, ART, and Just do it if you need to. with diverse EXPERIENCES Pay it forward – share a smile, a Meaningful hug, hang out. contributions Find a purpose through the contributions you can make and seek opportunities for growth – personally, professionally, a sense of and socially. purpose growth GET HELP Find a purpose through the contributions you can make an opportunities for growth – personally, professionally, and If you or someone else is feeling lost, lonely, whakapouri or just wanting to talk, there are lots of people who can help: Le Va www.leva.co.nz Lifeline Aotearoa 0800 543 354 Youthline – 0800 376 633 Suicide Prevention Helpline 0508 TAUTOKO www.wakahourua.co.nz www.pacificpeopleshealth.co.nz