Services to Help You: There are many organisations available to provide support during this difficult time. Everyone is an individual and will respond to different help and advice. It is important to find an organisation that meets your needs. Australian Multiple Birth Association www.amba.org.au Tel: 1300 886 499 Bears of Hope www.bearsofhope.org.au Tel: 130011HOPE for grief support Bereavement Care Centre www.bereavementcare.com.au Tel: 1300 654 556 Open Doors Counselling and Education Services www.opendoors.com.au Tel: 1800 647 995 Pillars of Strength www.pillarsofstrength.com.au Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Research and Information (PILARI) www.pilari.org Pregnancy Loss Australia www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au Tel: 1300 720 942 SIDS and KIDS NSW www.sidsandkidsnsw.org Tel:1800 651 186 healthdirect Australia 1800 022222 A 24-hour government health information and advice line. Grieflink www.grieflink.org.au Little Angels Memory Boxes (LAMB) www.littleamb.org.au Tel: 1300 305 595 Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day Events are held on or around the 15th of Oct each year For an up to date list of these events across Australia, visit: www.15october.com.au National Association for Loss and Grief www.nalag.org.au Tel: 02 9489 6644 Mums Like Me www.mumslikeme.org Tel: 0422 133 328 Yasminah’s Gift of Hope www.ygoh.org.au Stillbirth Foundation www.stillbirthfoundation.org.au Tel: 02 9967 3229 The Compassionate Friends NSW Inc. www.thecompassionatefriends.org.au Tel: 02 9290 2355 Pregnancy, Birth & Baby Helpline 1800 88 24 36 You can ring the helpline any time of the day or night, 7 days a week. Further Information: NSW Health resources Early pregnancy - when things go wrong www.health.nsw.gov.au/pubs/2009/pdf/early_pregnancy.pdf There are other counselling and support services available through qualified practitioners which the Maternity Services Unit at your local hospital or your GP can refer you to. Health Professionals & the Community Supporting parents in their grief and loss Heartfelt www.heartfelt.org.au Tel: 1800 583 768 SANDS http://www.sands.org.au/ Pregnancy and Infant Loss Information for parents about the post-mortem examination of a stillborn baby www.health.nsw.gov.au/pubs/2007/pdf/post_mortem_1.pdf SHPN (NKF) 120302 Sometimes pregnancy does not go well… What can you do to help? Babies can die and their deaths have a significant impact on the parents, siblings and broader family, friends and colleagues. Offer support and condolences as you would for the loss of any other member of the family/friend. Be available to listen patiently. The loss of babies at all ages and to any type of loss matters. A family’s pain cannot be measured by how old the baby was – the loss of a baby at any stage is a time of grief for the family. Offer to cook a meal, do the washing, provide childcare. Be patient and available to listen, often to the same details. Grief and loss affects everyone differently. Because of this, it’s impossible to know how parents and family will react to the loss of their baby. Use the baby’s name and ask questions about the baby. Parents appreciate it when loved ones show support and remember their babies. Both parents need recognition and support as well as a time to grieve. Siblings and other family members also need support. It is important for parents to be encouraged to create mementos of the life of their child. Recognise that both parents, siblings, and other family members need acknowledgement and support. Loss should not be judged. Community understanding and consideration of the loss of babies can assist a parent through their grief. Grief and healing have no time limit and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Be supportive and patient with a family or friend who has faced loss. It is in the support that they receive that the healing will come, not with time. Even though the parents had little, if any time to “know” their child, the parental attachment is still strong. Parental attachment can begin even before conception, as parent’s dream of the baby’s first birthday or special family events. When a baby dies, parents lose a future they looked forward to sharing with that child. If you are affected by the loss of someone’s baby, there is support available. Hospital staff can advise about the organisations and services available. See back page for a list of some useful services. Remember the baby’s birthday, and other important dates, by putting a reminder in your calendar. Parents often need greater support around these times and may wish to do something special to remember the life of their child. About 1 in 5 pregnancies end in miscarriage About 1 in every 100 babies is stillborn, or dies soon after birth Visit the cemetery or other special place with them. The community can show their support for parents and families by participating in events on 15 October. There are many other support actions than those listed. Remember - an action of support is usually always welcomed and shows family members that you care and want to help.